Why Relationship Therapy?

A key difference between individual therapy and relationship therapy is the time in which people choose to access therapeutic help. Individual therapy is often about one’s development; there is some awareness of an inner conflict that the person wants to understand. Working through that inner conflict helps that individual understand their position and make clearer choices.

Most people choose to seek relationship therapy at a time of distress – when conflict feels relentless and/or unending, or there are fears that the relationship might end. It is common for partners or family members to come to therapy when they are very anxious about the state of the relationship. There is also a wish that ‘something should be done’ (ie, the conflict is resolved), and that the therapist might be able to ‘mediate.’

Like any other human interaction, therapy takes some time and commitment, to build understanding. Working with a relationship means that the individuals involved and the therapist try to listen and hear each other. Listening and understanding does not necessarily mean you agree with the other person, but it does ask us to acknowledge different perspectives. Listening and acknowledging a story that is different from ours, can be difficult when we ourselves feel anxious we might not be heard.

A relationship therapist is specially trained to help individuals listen to each other, so they are able to understand and tolerate a perspective different from their own. Through this process, you are helped to communicate safely and freely, so that you can work together in managing the differences you hold.  Being able to listen to each other helps build understanding and empathy. In the long term, relationship therapy helps partners build collaborative relationships based on mutual trust and respect.